This Is How Much Guests Should Spend on a Wedding Gift, According to Experts

By accepting a wedding invitation, you're officially agreeing to follow every wedding guest etiquette rule, including buying the happy couple a gift. However, accepting an invitation also means bearing the costs of travel, lodging, and other day-of expenses, which can put a serious dent in your budget and hinder what you're able to afford. Sounds expensive, right? At this point, you may be asking yourself, "Is it even possible to balance every financial obligation and still give a great wedding gift?"

The answer is simple: It's okay to factor in your other expenses when deciding what to gift to a newly married couple. "A wedding guest should always give what they feel best celebrates the occasion, taking into account their budget as well as their closeness with the couple," explains wedding expert Sara Margulis. But before you decide to give the newlyweds a random amount of money—or purchase an arbitrary item—it is important to be aware of the average (and recommended) amount a guest should consider spending on a wedding gift.

To provide you with more insight, we asked several experts to share everything you need to know when deciding how much to spend on a friend or family member's wedding day gift. Read on for more.

The Average Wedding Gift Amount

According to the experts, the average wedding gift amount hovers right around $100 to $150, though that can increase or decrease based on how close you are to the couple and whether or not you're attending with a plus one. "While it varies based on demographic, region, and culture, the average amount that I’ve seen a guest spend on a wedding gift has traditionally been in the $100 to $150 per guest attending range," shares wedding planner Elizabeth Priya Kumar.

"A lot of this ideology came into fruition when the notion was that you should 'pay for your plate.' A fancy meal in America right now will end up costing around that, so the thought was that the guest attending would cover their own meal," Kumar continues. Wedding planner Anthony Navarro echos that sentiment, sharing, “If you think the couple getting married is spending an average of $100 to $150 per person at their wedding, the price of your gift should equal that amount."

How Much to Spend by Relationship

Though the average wedding gift amount is within the $100 to $150 range, your relationship with the couple will greatly influence how much (or little) you should ultimately spend. So for an average based on your relationship with the couple, take a look at wedding etiquette and registry expert Allison Cullman's breakdown below.

• Coworkers and distant relatives: $50 to $70, on average
• Friends: $75 to $100, on average
• Close family, best friends, and the wedding party: $100 to $150+, on average

Of course, personal finances and budgets will impact what you can ultimately afford, so these numbers aren't set in stone and should only be used as a reference point. "If you're attending with a plus-one, it’s customary to double the gift amount," adds Cullman.

How to Budget for Wedding Gifts

While attending a wedding can be expensive, there are ways to help minimize expenses, as highlighted below.

Only spend what you can afford.

It seems easy enough, but this one’s worth mentioning: Limit your investment to what you can actually afford, even if it’s less than what etiquette suggests. If you can’t find a single item that fits your budget, consider purchasing a few smaller items to total an amount that works for you. (It’s also a great way to help the couple stock their home with items that are often overlooked, like measuring spoons or cutting boards.)

The couple wants you to be there to celebrate with them, so prioritize your budget however you need to make that happen—even if that means a smaller gift so you can cover the cost of the hotel room. This is especially true for individuals in the wedding party, who may have to spend a significant amount on pre-wedding activities and attire, and thus may not be able to afford the average amount.

Know when you don't need to give a gift.

While gifts are expected at the wedding and bridal shower, stretch your budget by remembering when you don’t have to bring one. For example, gifts are not expected at the engagement party (though a card congratulating the couple is a nice touch). And if you’ve contributed serious time or money by helping out with the wedding, like hosting the bridal shower or serving as the bride’s makeup artist on the wedding day, you’re not expected to spend on a gift, too. By only bringing gifts to events where they are expected, the money you have to spend will go a lot farther.